How Sexual Harassment Feels for Women

Here’s a lit­tle piece that was a real eye opener…

We were dis­cussing homo­sex­u­al­ity because of an allu­sion to it in the book we were read­ing, and sev­eral boys made com­ments such as, “That’s dis­gust­ing.” We got into the debate and even­tu­ally a boy admit­ted that he was terrified/disgusted when he was once shar­ing a taxi and the other male pas­sen­ger made a pass at him.

The light bulb went off. “Oh,” I said. “I get it.  See, you are afraid, because for the first time in your life you have found your­self a vic­tim of unwanted sex­ual advances by some­one who has the phys­i­cal abil­ity to use force against you.”

The boy nod­ded and shud­dered vis­i­bly.  “But,” I con­tin­ued. “As a woman, you learn to live with that from the time you are four­teen, and it never stops. We live with that fear every day of our lives.  Every man walk­ing through the park­ing garage the same time you are is either just a harm­less stranger or a poten­tial rapist.  Every time.”

The girls in the room nod­ded, agree­ing.  The boys seemed gen­uinely shocked.  “So think about that the next time you hit on a girl.  Maybe, like you in the taxi, she doesn’t actu­ally want you to.”